10/4/2011 Dialing 911

Why is it that at the exact moment when I am feeling really great, in a reverie of happiness something happens? I was driving on a stretch of freeway that is just beautiful, having just been told I was beautiful by the knife sharpener, listening to uplifting music, aware of the sun filtering through the mist and clouds, distracted momentarily and then back to the reality of stuff flying through the air as a major accident unfolds before my eyes. I was far enough back to avoid the debris spreading and moving across the highway and to slow down while looking in my rear mirror. I saw a huge semi-tractor trailer with a liquid tank on the back, kind of fishtailed across the three left lanes, and several other vehicles. I tried to think what to do. In the past this feeling of uncertainty would result in me driving on, as many folks did, figuring what? That someone else will surely have called or helped. I found a sort of safe place on the right, although it was an exit ramp and noticed a vehicle pulled behind me. I dug out my cell phone and called 911. I looked for landmarks while the phone rang and was able to give them an exact location and describe what I saw. I was expecting the dispatcher to say there was already a CHP on the way, but instead she said will get someone out there. So possibly I was the first caller. After I hung out, I realized that cars were already driving past in the right lanes, and it would have been impossible to get to the people on the left. I noticed one man walking around looking 100% fine, not panicked, so hoping no one was hurt and realizing there was nothing I could do, help on the way I drove on. So here's the thing, this was the first time I have ever called 911. And there have been other situations, accidents barely missed, the time my infant son had croup, but my indecision always weighed out on the side of doing nothing. In the case of my son, our neighbor the physician called, the result being two NYC police on our doorstep, whisking him off to the hospital. I realized that all those moments of not knowing what to do, I did know what to do, I was just afraid to do it. As if I would get in trouble if I called 911 and it wasn't really an emergency. So I hope that everyone was fine today. I'm glad I called it in, because stepping up is far more important than being right and I'll try to keep remembering that the antidote to uncertainty may just be doing the thing that you are uncomfortable with.